I was worrying, for a while, that my internal anger was dying down a bit. Then I read this piece over on Comment is Facinorous. David Cox, occasional author for Prospect and the New Statesman, argues that actually being a bit of a toff isn’t that big a deal. In fact, he says, when they get elected they can bring some advantages to the tasks at hand. All this is of course set amongst the debacle of the attacks on Boris Johnson, the attacks on Cameron’s Etonite front bench and the attacks on the Tory candidate in Crewe.
How I wish, sometimes, that a long string of expletives or an iron bar to the head would serve as an effective retort to such utter piffle as this. As we know it won’t, I suppose I shall have to pick apart Cox’s point piece by piece. Starting with the following quote: “Toffs tend to be less desperate for the fruits of power, as they have other entertainments available. They consider gross public improbity a bit demeaning, preferring instead sexual misdemeanours which entertain rather than affront us.”
Everyone is familiar with the cash for peerages scandals, both belonging to Tony Blair and to other Prime Ministers. It would be a mistake, however, to conclude that simply because the most famous transgressors were Liberal and Labour PMs, that Toffs haven’t played a role. Tony Blair, was a privately educated Oxonian, as was Harold Wilson. Narrowing the focus merely to cash for peerages however ignores the research which suggests how Conservative MPs, from the post-war period, made fortunes peddling influence.
Toffs respect public probity? Pull the other one, it has bells on.
Who are we classing as Toffs? Did they have to go to Eton, Winchester, St. Paul’s or Harrow? Let us not forget former Harrovian and Bullingdon clubber John Profumo, who, far from amusing the public with his sexual shennanigans, blatantly lied to the House of Commons. Let’s not ignore that Sir Tom Cowie stopped funding the Tory Party on the basis of cronyism on the front benches, something helped, no doubt, by Cameron’s imposition of an A-list for candidacy selections which included more of the same.
If we turn to expenses, the party gets all the more interesting. Michael Howard has an impressive list of padded expenses including mortgages, utility bills, council tax, phone bills, cleaning, food and provisions and household repairs. Conservative nepotist Derek Conway may have been educated at a bog-standard comprehensive, and of the hitherto disclosed MPs who employ their own family a majority may be Labour - but there are many more ways than these most obvious ones to skin a cat.
We need only look at the revolving door between public and private sector to see where all the former private and Oxbridge educated ministers of Margaret Thatcher’s government have sodded off to, in order to feather their nests.
Corruption doesn’t respect class barriers, that much is fairly obvious. It is ludicrous of people like Cox to maintain, as has been argued since wages were first introduced to the Commons, that the wealthy, well-bred should be parliamentarians because they can resist the occasional pressure to partake of cake having and cake eating. Those bred into power and wealth are just as susceptible as the rest.
More importantly, even were they not so susceptible, such people come with their own set of vices which, contra this chap Cox, are not so forgivable as the occasional sexual indiscretion. Enoch Powell, educated King Edwards’ School, was a racist. How many on the Tory ‘Etonian’ bench have shown themselves to be anti-feminist, prejudiced towards the ‘traditional’ family and more than willing to look out for the corporate sector over and above normal working people?
Don’t even start me on the religious bigotry of the Conservative Cornerstone Group, all the prominent members of which were educated privately; Julian Brazier, Edward Leigh, the Winterton pair and that malodorous scarecrow John Redmond. I think attacking Boris Johnson as a Toff was a mistake; whether the SDLP “Stop the DUP” campaign, or the Tory “Evil Blair Eyes” campaign, negative attacks usually are, unless they are based on substantial issues.
For god’s sake however, don’t swing the other way and think that all the privately educated nobs are fine and dandy. They aren’t. Many of them do have some remarkably objectionable qualities. If I was to pick out one of Boris’ qualities which he shares with so many privately educated tossers, it would be his seeming disengagement with the subject of any question being asked. Hiding behind the mask of the posh oaf. It’s dishonest and disrespectful to people who go to see and talk to him about real issues.
I dislike the concept of private schools, and of the people whom I have met who were privately educated, a greater percentage of them tend to irritate me than those who are just common oiks like myself. Yet we should not be handing the Etonians the victim hat to wear; no doubt honest, hard working people in Crewe find Labourites cavorting round mocking the Tory candidate to be petty. You know why? Because it sodding well is petty.
Toffish upbringing is not limited to the Tories and neither is corruption, idiocy and mediocrity limited to Toffs. Pretending that either of these things is the case, when most people feel our own leadership has its head just as much up its own arrogant arse, is a stupid tactic which we’ll pay for at the polls.
Posted by David Semple